February Arizona Visit

We headed south again this year, this time because my sister finally got some vacation after 6 months of her new job in CT and was going to visit with Jason too. We hadn’t seen the Asuzu’s in 6 whole months since they moved so it was definitely reason to go south again. Jason was 11 months and almost walking so we were excited to get the boys together to play. We had a whirlwind weekend, jamming in lots of activities around naps. We got in on Thursday afternoon and got to spend some time with Mom, Dad, Gma, and Gpa that evening.

One awesome story that must be mentioned was that Grandma took Judah out to have him help fill the fountain. Somehow Grandma surrendered custody of the hose to the two-year old and the next thing I knew water was hitting the kitchen window. I ran over to see Mom running around the backyard, being chased by Judah’s hose spray. I debated for a few seconds whether I should go out to rescue her, thinking I’d rush Judah, thankfully she was much quicker thinking then I and in that time went for the faucet.

Amanda and Jason arrived on Friday and Mom and I were able to go pick her up. Judah and Jason hit it right off, wrestling and playing with Aunty Mandy and Grandpa Mike. Grandma had also gotten some new lego toys to enjoy which Judah did. On Saturday we were able to go with Dad to the shooting range and check out his new guns. It was pretty fun to try them all out, we spent more than an hour on the range. Over the weekend Jamie, Mom, and I were able to enjoy two 9 hole rounds of golf over the weekend while Amanda and Grandpa graciously watched the monitor during napped and hung out with Judah when he woke up.

Sunday we got to go with Mom and Dad to church. The boys went to the nursery and had a great time. Afterward Grandpa Great made us a lovely brunch including an awesome egg bake. Monday was a huge day of shopping at the mall. Grandma treated Amanda and I to Pandora charms for our bracelets and the boys to new shoes at Stride Rite. Judah also got a fun new pair of cowboy boots on an outing with Grandma and Grandma Great. After shopping we went back to the gun range and shot again, this time with some gun rentals so we could try out some other types of guns. Tuesday came too soon and we headed back to the airport to go home super bright and early. We were able to help Amanda and Jason to their gate before heading to our gate.

Saying Goodbye

January 11th, 2013, at 8 am, Michelle Beaver Zaehring was 17 weeks pregnant and we were both excited to soon be sharing our expectant plans for next June on Facebook.  By 11 am, we were weeping in an Ultrasound room on Capitol Hill, as our future dreams and our family of four became a grieving family of three.   
These photos are the only glimpse of the precious hands and feet of our son we'll get to see this side of Heaven.  Our unborn son, whom we'll never get to hold, will never be forgotten.  
That day in a darkened room, when that nice doctor man told us our baby was no longer alive, we felt such an aching loss and were overwhelmed with a moment of panic.  How can we make it through this?  The grief, sadness, and shattered dreams hit us like chaotic waves, yanking us this way and that while time seemed to stand still.  And yet, in the midst of it, almost covered by the darkness was a quiet voice of total confidence whispering.  Jesus is in the boat with us.  We live, and love, because He first loved us by dying for us.  He brings peace to our stormy hearts.  
Matthew 8:23-27 was so encouraging to us during that first week:
"And when he got into the boat, his disciples followed him. 24 And behold, there arose a great storm on the sea, so that the boat was being swamped by the waves; but he was asleep. 25 And they went and woke him, saying, Save us, Lord; we are perishing. 26 And he said to them, Why are you afraid, O you of little faith? Then he rose and rebuked the winds and the sea, and there was a great calm. 27 And the men marveled, saying, What sort of man is this, that even winds and sea obey him?"
We are healing now, one month later, and wanted to share the joy of the brief life of our son with all of you, as well as share our love for Jesus for loving us enough to "ride in our boat."  
We’ve been reflecting on Psalm 42 and learning a song called “Satisfied in You” as we wrestle with this loss.  Please take 5 minutes and listen to it while you think of us. 
The words of this song say our feelings best: “Let my sighs give way to songs that sing about your faithfulness, Let my pain reveal your glory as my only real rest, Let my losses show me all I truly have is you.”  We are learning to trust and worship Jesus in this, even if those two ideas just got a lot harder and a lot more real, from our perspective. 
We ask that you hug and cherish your little ones who made it into this world safely a little extra tonight.  We certainly will.
More thankful than ever for God’s unfailing love,
Michelle, Jamie, and Judah Zaehring

Christmas Card 2012 Preview

Don't look if you want to be surprised when it comes to your mailbox!

 

Photo Card

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Pain of a Father

I'm not in favor of haircuts for tiny kids anymore....tonight we took Judah to get his haircut and instead of a fun trip to a kids playground with a haircut on the side, we had a traumatic experience. Everything was fine and fun (see photo) till the mean lady with the noisy vibrating razor blades started trying to attack his neck... Then my heart was ripped out by having my son look into both his parents faces with confusion and overwhelming fear, wondering why they would put him in this race car chair like some sort of sick trick..... And, finding that he couldn't escape, and realizing that they actually wanted him there....breaking down, mouth quivering, then sobbing, hands trembling with fear and clutching to moms finger as if to life itself.....and then the Father being asked if he could please hold his son still, in a headlock, so she could trim the hair around his ears....all for what? "Oh, think of how cute he'll look...", I said to my wife. The shame of my vanity has no end....

Pumpkin Hunting

We made another visit to Fairbank Farm this year. This is the farm literally right around the corner from our house. They are open on Saturdays in October and have animals and pumpkins. It was fun to take Judah back this year and remember how little he was last year. He really enjoyed feeding the ducks and chickens. We also saw really cute little pigs, a horse, a cow, lots of ducks, chickens, and other birds. He also enjoyed the pumpkins and the wheelbarrow. Of course the first thing he did when he was in the pumpkin patch was try to lift up a big pumpkin. He eventually found a little one and proceeded to toss it into the air like a ball. After our farm visit we went out for lunch to our favorite Chinese restaurant, Taster’s Wok. Judah loved it and ate really well. Later in the day we were able to attend our friend, Logan’s, 2nd birthday. He is one of our friends we walk with on Friday mornings. He had party hats, books, and ballons at his party, all were a huge hit.

Just for fun, here's our family picture from last year.

And some more fun pics from our day.

 

Who needs a fancy t-ball set

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Jamie and I looked over from discussing a project to see Judah teeing up his ball on the patio umbrella holder and then hitting it with the broom stick.

Pure Child Excitement